A weak week off for some NFL teams

Written by The Fool on September 22, 2005

The Fool chuckled when he actually took a second to glance at the teams which have off weeks in the NFL this weekend: Baltimore, Detroit, Houston and Washington. Statistically, three of those teams are among the worst in the league offensively, and the fourth one, the Redskins, have really only mounted one quarter’s worth of good work – it was just really, really impressive, so much so that it altered their stats enough to make the offense seem respectable. Sane folks – even The Fool – know this.

More telling, perhaps, are the scoring numbers. There are 32 NFL teams, and Houston ranks 32 in scoring, Baltimore 31st, Detroit 29th and Washington 28th. Detroit has three touchdowns, the other three teams have two each.

Bottom line? You’re probably not missing much with this fecal foursome getting getting a weekend off. The best performer from this group is Santana Moss, and again, most of his damage came in one quarter of play. Sadly, we have not been able to rely on players we thought would be fantasy studs this year – Detroit’s Kevin Jones and Roy Williams, Houston’s Andre Johnson and Dom Davis, Washington’s Clinton Portis and Baltimore’s Jamal Lewis (perhaps the worst of the bunch at 26 carries for 57 yards after two games).

It’s actually shameful these units get time off, because they certainly have not earned it.

King’s things

The Fool and friends have thoroughly enjoyed watching Barry Bonds smack home runs in cavernous RFK Stadium this week. And just in case you’re not keeping track, he’s got four homers, 6 RBI in just eight games since coming back, along with a .318 batting average. And, he was intentionally walked by the Nationals on Wednesday, so now you know he’s back – other managers already fear him again. . . . Need a running back? There’s a chance Derrick Blaylock went undrafted in your league. He’s the backup on the Jets to Curtis Martin, who may not play this weekend. Give Blaylock a shot – it worked for folks who had him last season when he backed up Priest Holmes in Kansas City. . . . As you read this, Ms. The Fool is landing in Tahiti. We’re busy trying to erase the memory of Eddie Murphy’s jokes from “Raw” about women going on vacation alone or with other women. Stay away, Dexter! . . . Is it pathetic that it took more than a year to realize we had a sleep timer on our remote control? . . . How funny would it be if “Pronk” Travis Hafner played with “Donkey” Adam Dunn? And a better question, is some tribe or activist going to sue baseball fans everywhere for continuing to refer to Nationals closer Chad Cordero as “Chief”? His college roommate gave him that nickname because Cordero had a one-eighth Native American heritage. Personally, I like the name my buddy James gave him better: Chadfredo Cordero! . . . And finally, it’s been two articles and two weeks since “The El Aminest” said he was going to go line for line, article for article, “on like Konkey Dong” style with The Fool. I suppose we should have known better, no? I guess he is plenty busy at his new job. Greetings!

-- Written by The Fool on September 22, 2005