The Morning Offering - March 25, 2005

Written by Dr Furious on March 25, 2005

Good Morning people and what a fine morning it is. It’s Friday and Furious only has one job these days … writing the morning offering. I have to admit it is a little weird being unemployed for the first time since 14, but that just leaves more time for drinking. It is Good Friday, so two of our five faithful readers might not be working this morning. For those who are heading out, coffee should either be made and drunk or brewing as you read. If it is not, then you should work on that. I have downed two espressos already, and I am thoroughly ready to give you the offering and combat unemployment in the Bush economic era. So let’s get on with it.

Bracket Buster
I really do not want to talk about the tournament, but I feel it is my duty to at least mention how much I stink. My bracket is pretty busted, as anyone who read my articles on bracketology would know. The Big East was exposed for frauds that they are, as heavyweights like Syracuse and UConn are already enjoying the comforts of home. West Virginia is proving that they can beat anyone, and the game against Wake Forest might have been the best ever. The Mountaineers continue to hit clutch shot after clutch shot (as they did against Wake) and now find themselves one win away from The Final Four following their win over the Red R-A-I-D-E-R-S. If you are wondering how to read raiders, just pretend you are watching NFL Primetime and Boomer (Chris Berman) was talking about the Oakland R-A-I-D-E-R-S.

Nova
The only other Big East team making me look good. Sumpter is gone for the rest of the Tournament, but that mean more minutes for Lowry. He may not be as smooth or cool as Mike Lowrey (of Bad Boys fame), but I bet Kyle has a much better jump shot. I predicted Nova to beat UNC, and it will be tough without Sumpter. I think the Wildcats can still pull it off. I have hope. I believe.

Steroids affecting your draft?
For those of you who have fantasy baseball drafts coming up, a big question must be where do you take some steroid abusing, former homerun hitting athletes. How far does Barry drop with the injury and steroid allegations? Will Jason Giambi hit more like his brother Jeremy this season? How far do you move Sosa up now that he is in a new, potent lineup and after he vehemently denied steroid use? Well with his injury, Bonds is falling the fastest. Some of the latest mock drafts have him projected as a pick to be made in the 70 to 80 range. What that means for most of you is that you should not pull the trigger on the slugger until the seventh or eighth round of your draft. There are reports that he may be out the whole season, so you may want to avoid him altogether

Golf
That’s right, Furious is even going to hit you all up with some golf knowledge. The opening round of The Players Championship, in beautiful Ponte Verde Beach in Florida, concluded yesterday. The leaderboard is devoid of names like Woods, Els, Mickelson, and Singh. The first round leader is Steve Jones. Let me repeat: The first round leader of The Players Championship is Steve Jones. Jones apparently shot a 64 and is eight shots under par. I know nothing about Steve Jones, but the limited research tells me that he has been injured much of the past two years. I know you must be wondering why I am talking about golf, but I can only say so much about the NCAA Tournament that I obviously know nothing about. Besides with my newfound freedom, I did watch a lot of the first round of The PC. I will say one thing: Steve Jones is a really good putter. He knocked in putts from 40 and 50 feet away yesterday.

Shout outs
Wifey sneakily requested a shout out this morning, so this goes out to her. Normally I might have protested, but there is little you can do when you are getting a backrub without having to pay for it. Also another shout out goes out to Xach, for hooking a brother up last night. Sorry to interrupt the date and I hope you proceeded with some proccedings last evening.

Not only is it Friday, it is Good Friday. If you want to show some respect for JC, I totally respect that. In an attempt not to be too sacrilegious, Furious will keep it close to the vest tonight. Enjoy the day folks, and keep your Fridays hate-free.

-- Written by Dr Furious on March 25, 2005